In India, we live in a society that bounds us to certain limitations. Since childhood, we are taught of our cultural and regional values, the do’s and don’s without any ifs and buts in the clause. We are taught how to be acceptable in the society and be the good girl/boy in the eye of our relatives, friends and neighbours.
We are taught to be in our limits, without the question of persistence and insistence. Specially having been born and bought up in a rural area (now progressed to the urban area), liberation was a slow and steady process. These boundations and feeling of not letting ones family down, takes us away from our reality, our choices and mostly our way to live on our conditions.
No doubt, we have progressed in the past years and come far from how we used to be. But, our society still have people, who wish for a boy over a girl, on the arrival of a new bundle of joy in the family, who still feels that it’s not okay for women to work, who still thinks that women should fast for family and have dinner only after the entire family finishes food. These are the same people who talk of Indira Gandhi and Sarojini Naidu stories from the past.
Libration is still required. And you need to speak up if you feel something is wrong.
Our cultural values not only design our thinking but sometimes even contradict us from thinking with an open mind. Do you think it is wrong, wanting a particular lifestyle for yourself? Taking a very layman example, few years back, I used to admire how pretty actresses look wearing flowey, sometimes short dresses and tank tops. I always used to wonder how my parents appreciate them wearing those dresses and not allow me to wear those. Maybe they were right at their part, but I was not wrong either.
Upon several requests to my mother, one day I finally bought one of the similar kind of dresses and when I got the chance to wear it, I backed off. Maybe I was way too conscious.My parents had liberated with their thoughts of letting me wear whatever I want, but my boundations didn’t let me wear that dress for a very long time. Months later, I wore that dress for a family dinner and I was all dolled up with praises from my family members. Isn’t that what I exactly wanted?
If you hesitate or are in a dilemma of what people will think of you, make sure to ask yourself a question — “Am I living my life for the society?” Your heart knows the answer.
So many students take science as a main subject during their senior secondary school due to peer pressure and end up dropping it for good, going ahead pursuing something which they desire for. The ones who don’t, are not happy the way things progress. At some point, one has to take a stand for oneself.
Famous author, Olin Miller once quoted, “You wouldn’t worry so much about what other people think if you realised how seldom they do.”
You are not doing it for the people who demean you, or to prove to the people, your worth. But yes, you are definitely doing it to contribute to the society, being an inspiration for many and make world a better place to live in. You are doing it not taking yourself away from who you are. At the end, your success stories will speak it for you irrespective of people who were there or not there to support you in your journey.
It’s YOU who has to set an example for the society if you want to bring in the change.
Liberation begins with a hope to change (for good)!